A new word: Repertoire

The Lonely Planet’s guide to SA suggests that you need not spend more than one day in Bethlehem to fully experience it. A weekend and a national holiday extended our 5-day training to 9 days in Bethlehem (with our wonderful Maluti mountain weekend) and hike in Golden Gate National Park on Youth Day. The Lonely Planet author has a point, but then again, he did not spend time with the parents and practitioners in our Tshepang group.

We finished our last training this week and as hard as it was to even believe we were really going to repeat the same training for yet a fourth time, we left with wet eyes today. This group “got” the essence of the material with depth and passion. There were also some characters in this group who made the whole experience quite enjoyable. We had lots of running jokes throughout. Early in the week we used the word “repertoire” and defined it. Everyone fell in love with the word, and a day didn’t pass without it being used at least once, and often in curious or hilarious contexts. The young trainer and translator Matilda made expressive faces and shared her frustrations when not finding the right words, whereupon others chimed in with suggestions of Sotho language that fit. We became a group.

Here in Bethlehem, we not only heard about the abused babies and toddlers, but spent time with a practitioner at the orphanage where she works. An HIV positive diagnosis accompanies most of their physical, emotional and cognitive challenges. We met a boy whose Sotho name means “Leave” (as in don’t come back). He had been abused in ways that seem unfathomable, as were his significant delays. When Faith and I visited, all the practitioners had the babies out on a beautiful clean rug, and were interacting with them. The next day Erin went by to visit. This time, they were all in their cribs, without much at all going on. Sigh.

Another dilemma arose when we had to decide whether to show one of our most problematic of all the pre-test videos after learning that the practitioner was, after all, in the training. We always begin with a message about learning from each other’s practice, about strength-based observations, etc. But the fact was, that this practitioner was alone with over 30 children under 3, and the results were not a pretty sight. With Matilda’s translation and me at pains to suggest that this would be a good learning experience, the practitioner said “no problem.” When I asked Matilda for counsel, she replied, “It’s OK, because this is the reality.” It did work out, and the practitioner clearly had a transformative experience.

The Working Group met Friday to roll out their plan to extend the knowledge they acquired into the community. They renamed themselves Tsebo ka di Bambinos, which means Knowledge for Babies. It doesn’t have the magic of the name Sesivukile, but these women are charged up and about to tell everyone they know about early brain development and why there need to be fewer babies in care despite the negative economic implications for the crèches. I ended my last entry thinking that the “Talking to Our Children about Difficult Subjects” would be a powerful session. I could not have imagined, and I can only say it is best summed up by one parent who said, “We need to become friends with our children.” They talked about how quickly the world is changing, and how they don’t want to raise their children as they were raised, yet they aren’t sure of the words to use. An elderly grandmother put it politely by noting that in their culture, certain ideas are just not given voice.

We’re back at Matol’s Farm in Viljoenskroon for the weekend, to finish up our draft syllabus and prepare for a week of meetings with the University of the Free State and their community partners in Bloemfontein, then to Pretoria for a UNICEF and national level Dept of Education and Department of Social Development folks, then Thursday evening we hop a plane to London and then JFK.

The closer I get to coming home, the more homesick I become, but will also miss our lives here and the people we have come to know deeply.

xxoova